Victory!

Who's house? Mikey's house.

Awwww yeah. Apparently, I don't just put the "icon" in "lexicon". I must also be the "man" in "portmanteau".

Putting The "Icon" In "Lexicon"

In addition to "Hobonanism", which is if course the act of masturbation performed by a homeless person, I'd also like to lay official claim to the word "hoboner", which is pretty self-explanatory, I feel.

Is "Hobonanism" A Word?

The right-wing Christian blogosphere is all abuzz with the shocking news that Sacramento's Public Library Authority voted to affirm the right of their libraries' patrons to access pornography on library computers. Now, in general, when forces friendly to the 1st Amendment triumph over the paternalistic, prudish people that would prohibit the proletariat's access to pornography (see what I did there?), I cheer. But this case... well, I'm still cheering, but it's a small, highly qualified sort of celebration.

Obviously a public library is designed to be a source of both educational and entertaining media, and I'd be lying if I said that in my misspent youth I didn't avail myself of some of the more explicit, salacious examples of that media. But I didn't, ahem, avail in the library. I did so at home, in private, where such behaviour typically belongs.

Listen, if someone wants to look at porn in a library (with headphones, if there's sound!), I have no problem with that -- so long as all they do is look. If they want to print it out or record it, take it home and avail, more power to them (hopefully they're availing to a legitimately purchased copy of The Bi Apple). But what if... what if they don't have a home?

Yes, that's right: While protecting our rights as adult citizens to access the full spectrum of media from a platform which we pay for with our tax dollars, the Sacramento Public Library Authority has also made their educational edifices a haven for masturbating hobos. Now look, I know that some of you might be very pleased by the thought of hobos pleasuring themselves, and I'm not going to judge you for doing so -- but I am saying it's wrong for hobos to manually pleasure themselves in a public library.

More seriously, this is a bit of a sticky (no pun intended) issue. Should adults be allowed to access pornography? Yes, absolutely. But the primary purpose of a public library is not to help its patrons get off, and I don't see an easy, cut-and-dry way of balancing the rights of the individual grown-up to look at whatever disgusting filth they desire with the library's stated purpose of maintaining a a safe, welcoming and comfortable environment for the public.

Hm. If only any professional librarians read this blog. I bet they'd have something insightful to say on the topic!